My role in ending my Marriage

I had the ingredients of a good marriage when I met a man who I admired.  I was impressed by his business dreams as he stated that which he wished to achieve.  I was happy to stand by his side and I felt amazement when I saw the energy he put into his goals and the dedication he had. It was easy to lavish on the praise because it was genuine.  Men respond to praise like little boys.  They cannot get enough and they sulk if they do not get it.  Eventually however, I must have decided that this man no longer deserved my praise because he was not being a good provider after all.  I became critical of the time he spent getting nowhere and at my best I simply said nothing.  I could actually see that he was still seeking the admiration I once had for him but my efforts were inconsistent and not genuine.  His lifestyle seemed to be keeping him distant and I could not see that I had a part to play in him seeking admiration elsewhere.  So, he married the very next woman who praised and valued him while I remained in a state of abandonment and victimhood for several years.  

I am not discussing right and wrong here, I am simply stating my observation about how male-female partnerships naturally seem to work when a woman has admiration for her man and shows it.

My story reminds me of an article I found today which I have pasted below.

The Woman’s Role in Maintaining a Good Relationship
By praising her man, a woman helps him develop and strengthens their relationship.

Today the divorce rate is astounding and most relationships are short-lived. Because of this, it is very important for people to find out how they can maintain a successful marriage.

In order for a woman to understand how to best fulfill her part of the relationship, she must understand the nature of a man. Then she will be wise and able to create a lasting and loving relationship.

But how can a woman come to understand a man's nature? After all, men and women are so different. In fact, the right understanding can come from the right actions. A woman should express her appreciation of her man, letting him know that he is special to her, that he is great - and doing this often! Then she will realize what he needs from her, and what kind of a connection there should be between them.

She will see that a man needs motherly care, praise, and admiration. Despite being masculine, big, and "macho," a man actually has a great need for sympathy. And if a woman gives this to him, he won't be able to leave her.

In fact, it's similar to how a woman acts with a child. She tells him, "You're wonderful, you did such a great job, you're big, you can do it, you're special, you're the most unique person in the entire world - you, you, you..." And this makes the man remain with her.

But most importantly, she should do this with love. A man desires to hear this all the time, because men really are like children, and they often see a woman as a mother. And even though this kind of a relationship may seem "imbalanced," it will become balanced out because it will make the man want to "rise up," to show how great he is. It will awaken his desire to become greater in a positive way, rather than in an overbearing, negative way.

Written by Michael Laitman of laitman.com